Response to #4750 ANTHONYBAHLIBI
It is good that you were able to express your situation in an organized and structured manner…this likely indicates you have been pondering these issues for some time.
You should also feel comforted that you have been led to this level of spiritual teachings, as it indicates a “readiness” on your part. You are the one engendering the bringing forth the teachings through this forum to assist your Asar (soul) to become re-memembered, and attain victory (Heru).
“When the ears of the student are ready to hear, then come the lips to fill them with wisdom.”
When I first started to read your letter, my initial thought was that you should get my book, De-stressing 101. As I read on, it seems that you did, but you indicated that you have not read it.
I would suggest reading it, because it is pre-mystical, meaning it deals with issues in time and space. It is a foundation for going into the higher mysteries.
I located this video presentation I did Jan on the De-stressing Book, however, as the group was slightly spiritually inclined, I was able to be a little more spiritually oriented, and I also added some some researches since the book. This was part of a online distance presentation to a group that asked us to participate in a shut in fast day they were having. You can also enjoy S. Maa’s presentation after mine as well.
There is a saying of spiritual teachers, aspirants must normalize before they spiritualize.
Our emphasis in the practice of Shetaut Neter is “INTEGRAL” which means working on a four main aspects of your personality…your intellect/wisdom, your emotions, your will, and your actions.
re: I would like to dedicate my whole life to purification and the teachings, no matter the circumstances I find myself in whether my life leads me to solitude, a relationship format, poverty or wealth, etc. Toss all those ideas out and put the teachings first and foremost in all my waking hours. I have really been contemplating what Sebai Maa said “There is No Time To Waste.”
The 4 main Shedy disciplines are to be practiced as you move through your practical life realities…so that you are not wasting time, so that you are becoming purified, so that you can evolve. They make the teachings a 24/7/365 practice. From the outside, people seeing you going through the motions of practical reality, but performing the same actions you did before, now with application of the disciplines according to the situation, you are making your way towards Nehast. The practice of the Shedy disciplines will become more perfected as your progress and your understanding continues to unfold.
Much of what you expressed related to how to act in the world…if to act in the world…what to act on in the world.
And you also expressed your feelings related to the acute stress response (Fight, Flight, Freeze) and also related to the chronic stress response (shutting down, tuning out, depression, frustration, etc.).
Stress holds energy, and thus, one would not have energy to put towards mobilizing one’s will power, and over time, one becomes emotionally drained and seemingly of weak will. It’s not because the will is not there…but because the will must be able to access energy/sekhem, and if this is being tied up physically and mentally in the body due to stress, then the will can hardly operate. The intellect/wisdom/mind cannot properly operate also if there is stress that keeps it in a dull or agitated state.
We do not live in a mystical culture, but we do live in a world operating through the Divine Plan. This earth is the larger Temple or soul school, where souls incarnate and evolve through higher teachings and tests towards Nehast, much in the same manner that humans have developed the different grades of school that we all move through towards our education of living in time and space.
So, even though everyone seems to be going through the same process of life, no two people are going through the same processes, no more so than two people sleeping in the same bed or room are having the same dream experience. While commonalities in the external situations bring people together…they each are giving and taking something different from the experience…according to the needs of their aryu.
I would next suggest you read the book, Conversations with God by Sebai Maa. It is a compilation of questions and answers aspirants have asked S. Maa over the years and his responses. You could simply read one each day. I believe you will find some of your answers there, and also it will allow you to see that your situation is not uncommon.
The issues you have encountered and are experiencing are typical of “life” lived without the foundation of a philosophy of De-stressing and a mystical goal…thus, typical of life in western culture.
There is a saying, whatever the question, the answer is, more Yoga. So you need to continue on in the teachings and some of these issues will resolve as they become understood by you and as they more able to be resolved by you.
But also, back to the statement of normalizing before spiritualizing, sometimes as discussed in my de-stressing book, this needs to take the form of seeking a counselor to resolves some of the issues of time and space and learn coping mechanisms which are generally founded in these mystical techniques, and are presented in the De-stressing book. They are referred to as “coping” mechanisms, even though they have a basis in mystical practices, because in the general psychotherapy they are only used to assist the individual to “normalize” relative to the practical world, and not to attain Nehast. So they are still important and useful, and through your ongoing study of Shedy, you will use them not only in this limited manner, but build on them for the mystical practices. This too should be seen as part of one’s practice of Rekh and Uashu….purifying the mind and heart (unconscious) of burdens (egoism). Just like western medicine is good for dealing with certain issues, though not good for promoting overall good health, so too western psychology can assist in certain key areas of mental health to bring about health, then one can move on beyond this level of healing. Further, there are licensed counselors who are more “spiritually” based/oriented, and some that are “naturally” oriented.
S. Maa and I are “big” on seeking assistance from “experts” in the field….car broken, go to good mechanic (my take a few tries to find a “good one”), marriage broken, go to good marriage counselor, childhood trauma and drama may be assisted by some types of counseling to unravel it’s impact on the areas of personality and will, and facilitate coping skills (to overcome the panic attacks). It may take a little trial and error to find a compatible therapist, but it can be done. The therapist should be viewed as a spiritual counselor by you, because the assistance is to help your soul evolve…to go beyond the normal the are trying to achieve for you, to “supernormal” (Nehast). And again, this should be seen as part of one’s Shedy Rekh & Uashu.
Issues can be assisted through the teachings, but if they are very complex and deep seated, and if the mind has developed its own unhealthy coping methods to protect itself from pain, then the teachings are unable to really help the aspirant much beyond the intellectual level…except perhaps at a slow pace with a lot of back and forth movement in and out of the teachings, especially when the teachings lead one to have to face these issues.
Remember that Nehast occurs in degrees and over time…so an aspirant must be prepared for “the long haul”…and therefore, must have a very good foundation in time and space, which is not just time and space, but the essence of which is the divine Self, and which is under Divine Plan, each person working on their own lessons and aryu as their lives intersect with others doing the same.
There is another saying, that before one can lose one’s ego, one must first have a healthy ego. This is saying the same thing, that one must be emotionally “normal” by practical reality standards before spiritualizing. It’s not that one must be egoless, but one must have a healthy ego (no self esteem issues, etc.) in order to become ego-less, otherwise the unhealthy ego will work to protect itself, and diminish progress on the spiritual path. Such aspirants can even have very good “intellectual” development, meaning they seem to have a good grasp of the teachings, but they are not able to live by the teachings and apply the teaching in their lives, because the foundation for spiritual health is not there or there in a very limited manner.
So, in summery, read my book De-stressing 101 and apply aspects of the recommendations that resonate with you.
Read S. Maa’s book conversations with God.
Keep on practicing your Integral Shedy to the best of your ability.
And you can also schedule to set up a private counseling session with myself and or S. Maa as well, or private message us, or email us privately.
I know S. Maa is also responding, so I will not go into more at this time.