“In all thy undertaking, let a reasonable assurance animate thy endeavors; if thou despair of success, thou shalt not succeed.”
-AEP
Udja
A very introspective post.
You stated: “I feel like am at a point where I am nearly ready to surrender. But my Ego (set) is strong and I am aware of my confused mind set and Ignorance of self.” And then also: “At the moment I trust the pace that I am going at is right for me now.”
It is important for a spiritual aspirant to find a balanced movement; this does not mean that an aspirant cannot have dynamism and activity but there should be harmony even in the heat of action. Then the contradictions are minimized and the conflicts, internal and external, are neutralized so that the pace of progress can be steady and challenges can more easily be overcome. Seba Dja delivered a very much recommended lecture on integral process at the 2014 Neterian Conference and you are recommended to view it at http://www.kemetuniversity.com/tv/
This will help you greatly in applying the teachings of Shedy that were discussed in that conference lecture series by me and during the current Saturday night classes series. http://www.kemetuniversity.com/tv/
Keep in mind that balance and harmony, maat ary {righteousness/order/truth} and im hetep {walking (movement/action) in peace} are hallmarks of Maat philosophy and are important features of the personality to cultivate in order to have ultimate success on the spiritual path. Realized that if you have had sufficient maturity to join this classroom and progress through the lessons that you are and will receive the necessary wisdom and tools to move forward on the path. It took some time to create your personality and it will take time to transform it but it will happen and it will not take lifetimes.
HTP
