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“Who is qualified to be taught the teaching?”
Reflections from Hmu Class 5-3-20
Asr Anpu Waset
When Sebai Maa gave the assignment to provide our reflections of this portion of the reading from class I initially thought I would have little to say about what was read. All of us as Hmu have been studying the teaching for close to 20 years now and all of us have seen many personality types come and go in the teachings. “We all can identify those who have the mental state to benefit from receiving the teaching” was my initial thought.
But as I considered what I would contribute in this reflection and read the page discussed in class later on that day, my idea about what this reading was talking about changed. And it changed when I read the first sentence of paragraph 3 on page 34 which reads as follows: “Those people who are not fully committed to the path of new learning because it conflicts with their previously held knowledge are not good candidates for mystical spiritual philosophy and the priesthood in particular.”
And then it dawned on me that this passage was not exclusively talking about people the Hmu consider for membership. It was also talking about us as Hmu and more specifically me. And review of the sentence led me to ask myself if I had been “fully” committed to the path of Shetaut Ntr.
And my answer was no. At least not fully. Shortly I will share why I say this.
During class I shared an experience I had with a former student who challenged me to provide him/her with an example of a mystical experience he/she thought the mystical experience should be. Even though at the time I thought the act of trying to fit the teachings into ones’ own idea of what the teachings/mystical experiences are supposed to be was a moment of spiritual immaturity by the student, it hit me that even today I do the exact same thing. And I realized this after reflecting on material from “The Veil of Ignorance” section of the book from Sebai Maa called “Egyptian Yoga, the Philosophy of Enlightenment.”
Specifically, the section starts out by stating that in the Prt M Hru it is said that the eternal soul comes to earth to learn certain lessons and become purified. Later on it says that because of the veil of ignorance as to the true nature of the soul and of God that we interact with the universe as if it “really exists,” as if we were interacting with an entity other than ourselves.
And this is when I realized that I haven’t been fully committed to the teaching. Because fully committing to the teaching would mean fully accepting the “fact” that we are souls/spirit that have come into time and space to become purified and “all” that accepting that entails.
I realized that “full” acceptance of the fact that I am spirit automatically and simultaneously means that NOTHING that I interact with is what it appears to be. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
Upon reflection I haven’t fully accepted this fact. Instead I like my former student have been fitting the teaching into my idea of what I think the teaching is supposed to be. In essence constantly ratifying the false premise that I’m a human being seeking to have an intermittent spiritual experience* vs the truth which is that I’m spirit that has come into time and space to purify myself of the desire to be human.
So this was great lesson for me not because of how it will assist me with guiding others who have interest in studying with me or joining the teachings, of course it will do that, but because I realized that after all these years of study, reflection and meditation, all the khunum nfr, all the selfless service that of course has been beneficial to my spiritual growth and evolution, I had still been unconsciously holding onto the idea that I was a human being seeking to have a spiritual experience when “full” acceptance of the truth would let me know that I’m actually pure spirit here to purify myself of the desire to be human.
Dua Sebai Maa!
Dua Seba Dja!
Dua to the Shemsu Ntr!
*Of course Nehast isn’t an intermittent experience. However, by not fully embracing what the teaching provides allows us to be comfortable doing what we do and being who we are (the human experience) while simultanously feeling good about this because we are students of the teachings.